Gifts money can't buy

Birthdays have always been special, all these years.   Even this year.

The plan was to go to Kochi, where J is, and spend a week there, to celebrate my birthday with him.  And I thought to myself, yeah, I can do with some pampering.  After the hectic theater rehearsals and an awesome show day where we did 2 shows within few hours, I definitely needed to rest awhile and let my hair down.  Luckily, my work permits me to work from wherever there is network connectivity, and all official approvals in place, was ready to enjoy the devilish monsoon of Kerala.  As a Madrasi, Its been a long while since I even heard the pitter-patter of a feeble rain.

That’s when all plans went topsy-turvy.  

Mom took ill and we had to put her through an Endoscopy which led to an biopsy, for which we are still awaiting results, with our fingers crossed.  Don’t ask me how worried we are.  I am tired of putting up a brave face in front of my parents and my younger siblings. And sometimes people just assume you are the strongest, while you know you are the weakest of all.  And the problem with showing up as a strong person is that, no one even wonders if you are okay. 

The first thing I did was to bring my parent’s to my home, and made them stay with me.  Though reluctant initially, they budged.

J immediately made plans to come to Chennai, during the weekend and stay on with me on my birthday, 18^th June, which fell on a Monday.  I can’t believe he took off on my birthday – he has hectic schedules, is such a workaholic and still chose to take off. He had traveled even the last week to watch our performance.  Oh yes, he helped me calm down and he is quite a strength when around.   One of my best birthday gifts this year.

The same week when mom took ill, my best friend and soulmate was travelling on a holiday and though I wanted to pour my heart out, I refrained from doing so, lest I would spoil the family vacation with my problems.  So, I was trying to sound normal, cheerful, and took care not to let let the cat out.  I must have put up that facade for a few days and I was convinced that this friend believed in my act.  Just before my birthday, out of the blue, I get a message – Hey, something tells me you are not okay. I stare into my mobile and the words blur as tears well up and blind me.  Felt so emotional that I almost froze.  Few hours later, I mustered some nerve to send a curt reply.  Stop cooking up stories in your head.  Have fun and enjoy your holidays. I also message back saying J is coming down from Kochi and will be here for my birthday.  That nailed it. I get a cryptic response “Good”.   

Yep.  Yet another birthday gift, no amount of money can buy – to be loved so deeply that a friend intuitively knows whether you are okay or not.  

I walk into the church that Sunday, 17^th of June, feeling a bit depressed and worried.  I have a few existential questions that runs in my head.  Worry distracts me to a point, where I am not able to focus and pray.  And the Choir sings my most favorite song as the entrance hymn and the chorus goes something like this -  God still, still loves the world.  So throw your life into his arms, day by day discern his plans, God is passionately busy loving you and me. I realise that my Lord is wishing me a happy birthday in his own way. I join in and belt it out as usual and my catechism children chime in along with me.

And yes.  The best gifts are what money cannot buy.

Postscript:

You can listen to the song that played in the choir,  here

The Mouse Trap

So as a pre birthday treat we went for this play titled “ The Mousetrap” by Agatha Christie, premiered in Chennai for the first time, by the Madras Players and The Crea-Shakthi group.   I got to know about this play from my good friend and a famous multi talented and a well known public figure Karthik TM, TMK as he is known from the EVAM theatre group. 

I had the good fortune of working with this versatile personality in two of my earlier organisations, first while I was with DSRC and then while I was with Satyam Computers.   While at Satyam I have worked very closely with TMK in Organisational Development activities through the training team that I was part of, then.

I have earlier taken Joe and Dennu, while I was at Satyam, for a play titled HAMLET ( which is a hilarious take on Shakespeare’s Hamlet) by the EVAM Entertainment group.  TMK was the heroine of the play and he was just fabulous.  That was a first real life play for all three of us and initially Joe and Dennu weren’t very convinced about an evening of theatre,  then.  But I remember the play was a laughing riot and Dennu and J enjoyed it so much more than me, literally Rolling on the floor with laughter.  

That was the day, when I also saw TMK transform into an ethereal artist on stage, and from then on, I have been his big fan. I have always wondered how poorly he is utilised in Tinsel town, for the measly roles he gets in movies.  He has acted in the tamil version of 3 Idiots, Nanban, as the prospective groom of the heroine. 

So when I told Dennu about this play, Dennu was willing to make time for the play ( amidst his busy fourth year engineering schedule, that is).  The paly was staged at the Music Academy on a Friday and the 1400 seater hall was full to the brim. The crowd was elite, classy and very much the kind who would watch theatre.

The stage was set well, keeping up the vintage English charm of those days when Agatha Christie wrote the play, the costumes and accessories, the acoustics doing justice to the entire cast and crew. I loved the way the storm was blowing and the snow blizzard is depicted on stage. 90 minutes of pure theatrical bliss.  Theatre bigwigs like P C Ramakrishna who has been in the field for the last 40 plus years had a meaty role in the play.  It was amazing to watch him as Mr Paravicini, who acts with an Italian accent.  He enthralled the audience with his expertise in theatre.  That role just fitted him so well.

My friend TMK, was the villain cum hero of the play and presented to Chennai,  the role of Detective Sergeant Trotter, which he did so perfectly.  Didn’t expect anything lesser from him.  The players who portrayed Mrs Boyle and  Major Metcalf did their parts so impeccably that when the director introduced them and said this was their maiden stage, it was unbelievable.  In fact, every one in the crew did justice to their role,  leaving the artists with an astounding applause during their introductions towards the end .

That was the shortest 90 mintues in a long time and an evening well spent. ( Momma – Sonny bonding)

For those who are not familiar with the Mouse Trap, a murder mystery from Agatha Christie here is a little sneak peak. 

The Mouse trap is world's longest running plays and is now celebrating its Diamond Anniversary in its 60th year!

Story goes like this.. A group of strangers is stranded in a boarding house during a snow storm, one of whom is a murderer. The suspects include the newly married couple who run the house, and the suspicions in their minds nearly wreck their perfect marriage. Others are a spinster with a curious background, an architect who seems better equipped to be a chef, a retired Army major, a strange little man who claims his car has overturned in a drift, and a jurist who makes life miserable for everyone. Into their midst comes a policeman, travelling on skis. He no sooner arrives, when the jurist is killed. Two down, and one to go. To get to the rationale of the murderer's pattern, the policeman probes the background of everyone present, and rattles a lot of skeletons.  This story has another famous Agatha Christie switch finish!

Its just a number folks!!!

43 is just a mere number not a mile stone. Isnt it an ugly number too?  I hate the very look of it. I don’t like it even when it is reversed to 34.

Why do I have to write about this number today?  Because, I am

                                              

Honestly where have all the years gone?

But wait,

Dont I?  and you better say "YES" cos today is my happy birthday :-)

I also realised today that,

Jokes apart,  I am looking back smugly thanking the whole universe for all the experiences that made me stronger and a better person, for a wonderful family, host of friends who surround me with love, my new found fellow bloggers ( this is the first year I am celebrating it with you all), sanity and contentment in life.

That reminds me,

Hey have you heard this saying, a diplomat is one who remembers a woman’s birthday but not her age. I hope the readers of my blog are diplomats. :-)

and incidentally,



17

Seventeen!!!

A sweet number.  Oh, not  my age.  Though I feel that way most of the time.  And I do sometimes behave like one.

At 5.25 am, 17 years ago, a nurse put a wet and squishy baby on my chest. I couldnt react.  I didnt even ask what baby it was.  No, I wasnt overcome with emotion to see my little one.  Infact, the nurse said to another one, please take that baby from her, she might push it away.  Actually i was in so much pain and was compeltely drained out to even look at the baby.

I remember swooning soon after that.

So it was actually a couple of hours later, when my dad came to me and said you have been sleeping (?) for a long time.  The baby is crying.  Thats when I looked at a wrinked, reddish and a cute little bundle wailing away and the glee on my mothers face told me it was a boy. 

I remember the 25year old girl transform into a woman, a mother, the time she set her eyes on this little one. and that transformational journey continues and I am so proud of being your mother Dennu.

It was this day, 17 years ago, yet another mother was born.

It was this day, this little one, taught me what parenting means,

It was from this day, I understood what my parents have done for me and what pains they have gone through for my sake.

It was this day, I realised nothing else matters in the world to me and my priority in life was just him.

and to this day, my journey has been great.

It is your birthday today Dennu, and  the day I was reborn as a mother 17 years back.

Love you baby and may the Lord watch over you throughout your life and while is  making you a better human being, let him also make me a better mother !!

Happy Birthday !!!

Was at it again....

yep, yep.  I was at it again.  ahhh.. the quilling, I mean.

Today is Anita's birthday. I have written about her many times in my blog before and truly consider her a blessing. 

Quilled this card for her, which took a little over 2 hours ( my timing has improved ).  I saw her eyes fill with happiness though she had a bunch of things going on in her mind.  She was in Chennai as her father was unwell and came visiting, not a great situation to be in. 

So, here is a peek into what I did for her on her birthday.

Close-up view of the card

The inside of the card with an extempore verse for her!!

The quilled card with pearl ensemble.

Birthday blah blah

I know I am growing old, because more than the friends and family’s wishes I had sms’s from Banks, insurance companies, shopping malls, mutual funds wishing me on my birthday – Luckily these wishes did not outnumber my family and friends circle. Small mercies in life.

I woke up this morning from a pleasant dream and lots of hugs from J and D, < Have I mentioned this before, I am sucker for hugs – People around me get tired of my requests for hugs and today, mind you only today, they were quite generous with it) and I had a smile playing on my face the entire day.

I am reminded of a quote “growing old is mandatory, growing up is optional”! And I guess this holds true for me in particular. :-) :-) Am I saying this with pride? May be.. I am 41 today ( OMG !!!), but I am not letting that come in the way of my attitude or in the way I lead my life and I have no qualms of accepting my age in any forum, not just in the blogosphere.

So here I am still feeling the need to wear new clothes ( I still get excited about new clothes – proof no one for not growing up !!) on my birthday and made sure I had plenty of them this time. I remember a couple of times, when I didn’t wear new clothes for my birthday in the past ( after marriage) I was overcome by enormous self pity later, and blew up exorbitant amount of money in gifts for myself. I am not taking a chance this time, am I?

J and D were so nice to me – anything was okay today and I did take a wee bit ( honestly, a wee bit) advantage of the fact that it was my birthday. J surprised me earlier this week with a lovely gift of a Kanchipuram saree ( which I would precisely wear once or twice). Infact, I had stopped picking up sarees for myself as I thought it is a lot of waste of money - 1. They are so difficult to wear and maintain 2. Once you wear a saree for an occasion you cannot wear it again ( a logic that J is never able to fathom, but I am sure many women would instinctively understand where I come from). J Keeps telling me that it is a criminal waste of money to buy sarees and just wear them only once.

Anyway I was surprised that J came up with this idea and I am still getting over the guilty pangs of picking up a saree which is the most expensive one in my wardrobe right now, and you know from the corner of my little heart, there were thoughts about killing so many silk worms, that I trying not to focus on…But I think I liked it. And J mentioned that he is so impressed with all the efforts had put in getting my little one prepare for his board exams. ( Pat on the back, moist eyes and play a melody in the background )

I had to go to office today as there was relaunch of an initiative from the unit that I work with and so I was at office in the city and spent my morning with a lot of kids and families of our organization. The little ones ( especially the girls and especially one little fellow) kept all of us on toes and made sure the morning was a pleasant and enjoyable one.

We had lunch together, J made sure he took a break from work during lunch time. I should have started my day with a mass, but it had to wait till evening. A cake cutting after church ( cake selected, ordered and brought home by D) completed my birthday. This is the first time, I had so many wishes on Facebook and I thanked each and every one.

All through the day, calls from loved ones kept me busy and everytime there was a call, I was ever so grateful. Rosanna played a song over phone on her Piano and really made me feel special, couple of other calls from onsite ( hey stop, onsite ??? or is it freinds abroad - occupationational hazards on being in IT) and some really close friends' calls made me feel so happy. 

And there was something else that made me really feel happy. A couple of days ago, I guess it was on Monday, I lost a gold pendant at home. Actually the hook of my chain had come off, and this pendant must have slipped out. It was a nice heart and was gift from a couple of my close friends for a birthday two years ago. When I opened the door for my cook in the morning, I felt something slip in my neck and realized it was the chain and by then, the pendant was not there. I really felt bad about losing the pendant one because it was a gift from some close friends and two because I making losing gold a habit offlate. Though I was pretty sure about losing the pendant at home and finding it someday, this was on my thoughts constantly.

J has given up on me and after checking a couple of times stopped asking about it. I had told my maid about this and she did a clean sweep with no pendant in all the dust. Today D was in a hurry dressing up, as he was coming with me to my office and he called out saying Mamma, I got your pendant. It was in his shoes. I was so happy that I got it back and made a mental note to be careful with my belongings in the future.

Isnt that lovely, that I had to get this back on my birthday ? I feel a strong presence of my Lord in my life and feel when I pray he truly listens !!!!